Tag: body

Your body is not your servant.

~ The Healing Modalities ~ Leave a comment

It’s your partner.

How many of us really know how to connect with and listen to our body’s signals and messages?

Most of us didn’t learn how to do this. In fact, we were often taught the opposite:
—to push through when we’re tired,
—to ignore pain in favor of productivity,
—to treat our bodies more like machines than living partners in our lives.

We learn to override, dismiss, and silence the messages our body sends us—until, sometimes, it’s too late.

For me, it took emergency open-heart surgery to understand just how disconnected I had become from my body. My recovery became the beginning of a deeper relationship with it—one built on listening, respect, and care. I realized that not knowing how to honor my body is part of what brought me to that crisis point in the first place.

I used to feel guilty for resting when I didn’t feel well, like I was being “lazy” or “irresponsible.” But guilt while resting only adds stress, not healing. I was resisting what my body needed—and calling it productivity.

Resting while feeling guilty isn’t actually rest. It’s conflict. One part of us says, “Slow down.” Another part says, “Keep going.” And while we lie there physically still, our minds race, criticizing us for not doing more. No wonder we don’t feel restored.

Sometimes, it’s not just discomfort with resting—it’s discomfort with being alone with ourselves. The thoughts we’ve avoided by staying busy suddenly bubble up when we slow down.

But what if we met that moment with compassion instead of criticism?
What if we said to ourselves: “I am choosing to rest and care for myself. This matters. There is nothing more important in this moment.”

This applies beyond rest too—it applies to what we eat, how we move, how we hydrate, how we breathe, and how we speak to ourselves. Every choice is an opportunity to treat our body as a friend rather than a servant.

I began asking myself simple but powerful questions:
➡ At what cost?
 ➡ What do I need right now to care for myself?

Sometimes the answer was water, or a slower pace, or canceling plans after a long day. Sometimes it was simply pausing to breathe and remember that I’m not a machine.

The truth is: when we ignore our bodies, we disregard ourselves.
Caring for your body is not indulgence—it’s responsibility. It’s a form of self-respect. It’s a daily act of honoring your life.

We so often long for love, care, and appreciation from others. But are we offering those things to ourselves?

In the past, I thought that pushing past my body’s needs was being responsible—getting things done, being strong, earning rest. But now I know: true responsibility includes caring for the vessel that carries us through this life.

When we start treating our body like a partner—not a problem to manage, or a machine to control—we begin to experience a whole new relationship with ourselves. A more respectful one. A more loving one. A more sustainable and healthy one.

Your turn:
– What might change if you treated your body as a partner, not a servant?
– What can you do today to connect more with your body’s wisdom?
– Are you willing to pause and ask: “At what cost?” and “What do I need to care for myself in this moment?”

What happens when you start listening?

Subscribe if you want to receive this content directly in your inbox.

Work with me: Want to see how self-care is transformative and can help you create the results you want in your life? I can show you how. I offer first-time seekers a complimentary 45-minute exploratory session. Sign up here.

What’s on your mind? It can be powerful to learn from each other and our common struggles when it comes to our practice of self-care–or just being a human being. If you have something you’re struggling with and would like some perspective, share it here. Your issue may be chosen and addressed in the next post–it’ll be totally anonymous.

How’s your body doing?

~ The Healing Modalities ~ Leave a comment

Connect.

How many of us know how to connect with and listen to our body’s signals and messages to us? Most of us didn’t really learn how to do this anywhere. In fact, we were likely taught the opposite—how to ignore and disregard our bodies: to keep going when we’re tired, to push through the pain to get it done, to always be productive and go after the next thing. 

After undergoing emergency open-heart surgery that saved my life and while going through the recovery process, I learned better how to listen to and honor my body. In actuality, it was because I didn’t know how to do that sooner that I got to the place of needing emergency open-heart surgery. I wasn’t understanding my body’s signals that led to my body’s illness. 

In the past, when I wasn’t feeling well, I didn’t allow myself to rest without feeling guilty, like I shouldn’t be taking the time off. And guess what happened when I felt guilty for resting when my body needed it? I created more stress because I was feeling guilty about resting and thinking I should be doing something else!

Resting when our bodies need it can be a hostile cycle if we’re not aware of what’s going on in our minds during the time. Part of us knows that we need rest and another part of us thinks about all the other things we “should” be doing but aren’t. So while we’re resting, there’s cognitive dissonance–we’re not at peace with our decision to rest. 

One way to be at peace with resting and caring for ourselves is to be compassionate with ourselves, to accept that we need to rest, and to consciously choose to rest: “I am choosing to rest and care for myself. There is nothing else I need to do right now. This is important and resting will allow me to do the things I want to do later.” This may help to decrease cognitive dissonance.  

This relates to more than just resting. It relates to what we choose to eat, drink, and do with our bodies, as well. 

So, instead of ignoring my body’s messages, I learned to slow down and check-in with my body, to familiarize myself with its signals. I learned to ask the questions: “At what cost?” and “What can I do to take care of myself in this moment?” 

And when the answer came, I gave myself permission to listen to and honor it. It could mean deciding to sleep in instead of going to the gym, or remembering to breathe deeply, or drinking some water, or choosing to eat (or not eat) something, or canceling evening plans after an unexpectedly tiring day at work. 

A realization that I came to while learning to listen to and honor my body more, was that by not listening to my body, I was disrespecting and disregarding myself. 

Self-care became a way to show myself respect and love, to regard myself with attention. How often do we expect love, respect, and attention from others when we might not even be giving these things to ourselves?

In the past, I thought that by pushing past my body’s needs, I was “being responsible” and getting things done that I thought I needed to do. But by not taking care of my body, that was actually being irresponsible. I see that now, but I didn’t see it in the past–likely because many of our societal messages told me the opposite. 

When we begin connecting to our body even more, we learn how to regard our body with attention, to listen to what our body needs. Then we can honor it by supporting it in a healthy, caring, respectful way.

Your turn: What can you do today to start connecting to your body more? Are you open to asking yourself the questions: “At what cost?” and “What can I do to take care of myself in this moment?” What might happen if you decided to give care and attention to yourself, to slow down and check-in with your body first?

Subscribe if you want to receive this content directly in your inbox.

Work with me: Want to see how self-care is transformative and can help you create the results you want in your life? I can show you how. I offer first-time seekers a complimentary 60-minute exploratory session. Sign up here.

What’s on your mind? It can be powerful to learn from each other and our common struggles when it comes to our practice of self-care–or just being a human being. If you have something you’re struggling with and would like some perspective, share it here. Your issue may be chosen and addressed in the next post–it’ll be totally anonymous.

Connect with your body

~ The Healing Modalities ~ Leave a comment

Listen to yourself.

I was in the emergency department earlier this week because my heart rate was elevated for an extended period of time. I’m sharing the info in this post as a reminder to myself and to you about what listening to and honoring our bodies can look like. Sometimes our wills are stronger than what our bodies want from us and we don’t listen or pay attention to our body’s signals. I am listening to myself even more attentively going forward! 

——–

How many of us know how to connect with and listen to our body’s signals and messages to us? Most of us didn’t really learn how to do this anywhere. In fact, we were likely taught the opposite–how to ignore and disregard our bodies: to keep going when we’re tired, to push through the pain to get it done, to always be productive and go after the next thing. 

After undergoing emergency open-heart surgery that saved my life and while going through the recovery process, I finally learned better how to listen to and honor my body. In actuality, it was because I didn’t know how to do that sooner that I got to the place of needing emergency open-heart surgery. I wasn’t understanding my body’s signals that led to my body’s illness. 

In the past, when I wasn’t feeling well, I didn’t allow myself to rest without feeling guilty, like I shouldn’t be taking the time off. And guess what happened when I felt guilty for resting when my body needed it? I created more stress because I was feeling guilty about resting and thinking I should be doing something else!

Resting when our bodies need it can be a hostile cycle if we’re not aware of what’s going on in our minds during the time. Part of us knows that we need rest and another part of us thinks about all the other things we “should” be doing but aren’t. So while we’re resting, there’s cognitive dissonance–we’re not at peace with our decision to rest. 

One way to be at peace with resting and caring for ourselves is to be compassionate with ourselves, to accept that we need to rest, and to consciously choose to rest: “I am choosing to rest and care for myself. There is nothing else I need to do right now. This is important and resting will allow me to do the things I want to do later.” This may help to decrease cognitive dissonance.  

This relates to more than just resting. It relates to what we choose to eat, drink, and do with our bodies, as well. 

So, instead of ignoring my body’s messages, I learned to slow down and check-in with my body, to familiarize myself with its signals. I learned to ask the questions: “At what cost?” and “What can I do to take care of myself in this moment?” 

And when the answer came, I gave myself permission to listen to and honor it. It could mean deciding to sleep in instead of going to the gym, or remembering to breathe deeply, or drinking some water, or choosing to eat (or not eat) something, or canceling evening plans after an unexpectedly tiring day at work. 

A realization that I came to while learning to listen to and honor my body more, was that by not listening to my body, I was disrespecting and disregarding myself. 

Self-care became a way to show myself respect and love, to regard myself with attention. How often do we expect love, respect, and attention from others when we might not even be giving these things to ourselves?

In the past, I thought that by pushing past my body’s needs, I was “being responsible” and getting things done that I thought I needed to do. But by not taking care of my body, that was actually being irresponsible. I see that now, but I didn’t see it in the past–likely because many of our social messages told me the opposite. 

When we begin connecting to our body even more, we learn how to regard our body with attention, to listen to what our body needs. Then we can honor it by supporting it in a healthy, caring, respectful way.

Your turn: What can you do today to start connecting to your body more? Are you open to asking yourself the questions: “At what cost?” and “What can I do to take care of myself in this moment?” What might happen if you decided to give care and attention to yourself, to slow down and check-in with your body first?

Subscribe if you want to receive this content directly in your inbox.

Work with me: Want to see how self-care is transformative and can help create a more meaningful life in which you start committing to yourself and show up the way you want? I can show you how. I offer first-time seekers a complimentary 45-minute exploratory session. Sign up here.

What’s on your mind? It can be powerful to learn from each other and our common struggles when it comes to our practice of self-care–or just being a human being. If you have something you’re struggling with and would like some perspective, share it here. Your issue may be chosen and addressed in the next post–it’ll be totally anonymous.